Hey ladies, welcome to the Mom to Mentor podcast. If this is your first time joining, welcome. If you are a repeat listener, thank you for your loyalty. Hey, I am continuing down the path of planting character seeds, not just for your child, but for you too, Mom. You know, along the way of life's journey, some things we just were not taught. And so we don't want to continue that generational curse with our children. So that's what this podcast is all about. To remind you, you're more than just a nurturer and a provider, but you are also an educator. You are a mentor to your children. And what's a mentor? That means you're providing a positive example to your children of how they should be. Life is gonna throw curveballs and they need to be ready for that. I know you've been throwing a few curveballs yourself. And as a result of that, you're like, hey, wait a minute, I don't know how to respond to that. So this is what this podcast is all about is to share with you techniques and things to consider as you're raising your children and as you're wanting to teach them. We should not leave it up to schools and other organizations to teach our children. That's our responsibility. People are saying, oh yeah, in school they need to teach them not to do drugs. Nope, that starts with us. We should be educating our children about what drugs are and how they affect their body. We should also educate them about alcohol. Keep in mind if they're watching you do these things, then there's probably a good chance that you trying to teach them is not gonna work. You are an example to them. You have to try to live a positive lifestyle in front of your children. What am I talking about today? As we continue to plant character seeds. And today's topic is etiquette. That's the formal name for it, or the informal name is manners and how you carry yourself. Etiquette is a code of polite conduct. If you practice proper etiquette, you are less likely to offend or annoy people. And you may even charm them. Many people think etiquette is about table manners and fancy restaurants, but really it's all about earning respect from your fellow man. That's what good etiquette is. It's a behavior that we all should practice that people respect us, not like us. Because I want to be clear on that, because people are still not going to like you for various reasons. But there is that ability to not like you, but still respect you, right? Because of how you carry yourself. And I've always said, I'm okay with people not liking me. But when they say they don't have any respect for me, that one hurts. It makes you think. So you want to strive for respect, moms. And how do you do that? You practice good behavior in public, and that's what we're gonna talk about today. All right, so why do we need to practice good behavior? Because we never know who we're gonna come across again later in life. And then secondly, everybody has smartphones. And what do those smartphones have? They have cameras and they have the ability to record. And people do it all the time. And so just be careful because we can't get away with stuff like we used to back in the day. You have to take these things into consideration when you're trying to earn respect and how you conduct yourself in public because someone may be recording something else and catch you not behaving very nicely in public. And then finally, you have to set that example for your children and so that they know what it means to have good etiquette and be polite. So I'm gonna give you some examples of etiquette and why it's important that you be aware that these things can come back and haunt you with future relationships, but also may haunt you with the next job you're striving for. And especially if you're taping stuff or recording stuff and uploading it to social media, keep in mind employers are looking at social media now. Yeah, they're taking those things into consideration. So, like I said, you can't get away with much anymore this day and age because you're potentially sabotaging yourself when you're uploading bad behavior to social media. So here are some things to consider, moms, when it comes to a good etiquette. Be mindful. And I know that you may have quite a few choice words or profanity that you use quite often. Keep in mind, you really don't want to do that in public. You know, that that's just who I am, and that's okay. But if you're trying to garner respect from your fellow man, then it's not a good idea to curse like a sailor out in public. I don't care how good your facial features are. You may be gorgeous, but as soon as you start dropping the F bombs and other profanity, all of a sudden your looks go out the window. Yeah. Yeah, but your voice, your word choices, all of that, how you conduct yourself in public, they have to be aligned because a lot of people will get turned off immediately once you start dropping curse words and excessively. Just be cognizant of that. And certainly, you know, one thing that irritates me a lot is when parents curse at their children. Oh, who addressed me bananas? I don't care how mad I've got at my kids. I never, ever curse them, ever. Because now you're planting a seed that is going to potentially grow as they grow. And guess what? Then they're gonna turn around and curse you. Yeah. And that's why we don't curse our children, right? You can use other word choices to discipline them outside of cursing them. I never curse them ever. Anyway, let me keep it moving. The other thing, consider moms talking loudly or yelling out in public. Again, not a good look. All it does is attract attention to you. And people are like, well, what's going on? And why are you so loud? And so it's gonna put you in a negative light. So you can, again, still get your point across, especially if you are disciplining your child. You don't have to scream in yeah, you can quietly say, listen, it's gonna be on when we get home. And it's just that simple. You ain't got to say, didn't I tell you? And I told you no, and blah. You don't have to do all that in public. Once you get home, if you want to go ahead and really let your hair down and tell them how you really feel, then that's fine. Because now you're behind closed doors. You don't have an audience. And that's what the public is an audience. You are on stage, mom. So I encourage you, please don't discipline your child in a loud voice. And not just your child, but any other situation that irritates you. And once you get out in public, there are going to be instances of someone irritating you. And you don't have to yell out loud about it. You really don't. You're gonna be like, oh wow, so-and-so just walked in front of me and didn't say, excuse me. That happens to me all the time at the grocery store. But I don't stop and say, Hey, cut that out. You didn't see me standing here. What you cut me out? No, no, no, no. I just said, Wow, okay, that's all right. And I keep it moving because you're not gonna interrupt my day. So, moms, again, be conscientious of your tone when you're out in public. The other thing, moms, to consider if you are engaging with someone on your mobile phone and you have them on speaker, okay, that's not good etiquette. That's not good manners, because no one wants to hear you all's conversation. It it is bad enough just to hear you alone on a call and having that discussion, much less the other person on the line and you hear their discussion. So when you are in public and you think it's okay to put this person on speaker phone, make sure you get agreement from them because they may not want to be on speakerphone. They may not want everyone to hear you all's conversation. When you start that conversation off, and it might start in a car and you're having a discussion and you take them off of the car speaker and you go inside the store and they're on speaker on your phone. You can, and matter of fact, before you get out of the car, hey, I'm at my destination. I'm getting ready to go into the store. And you're on speaker phone. Are you okay with that? And they can say, Yeah, I'm okay with that, or no, I'm not. But you definitely should get permission or acknowledgement from them that they're okay with being on speaker. And again, I would say just don't do it at all. Okay. Finish up the conversation in the car before you go into the store. And hey, sis, or hey, bruh, I'll call you back later uh when I get back in the car, right? Because is it really that important that you have to have this conversation by speakerphone? Think about that. Think about that. Because majority of the public does not want to hear that interaction, and that's true. All right, where else? It is very easy when you have a boo thing that you all have a disagreement, and sometimes those disagreements get loud. So try to prohibit or eliminate having an argument in public because again, nobody wants to hear that all you're doing is attracting attention to yourselves or unwanted attention to yourselves. That's a private conversation between the two of you. And if you can't agree, then say, you know what, we're gonna agree to disagree, or we'll discuss it later. But don't do it in public. That is your private conversation, your private issue you're trying to resolve. And the public has nothing to do with that. Nothing to do with that. And then plus, you never know who's gonna pull out their phone and say, hey, listen, they really going at it. Y'all gotta see this. The next thing you know, they're recording. Then it goes on TikTok, then it goes on Instagram and all of this stuff for something private between you and your booth thing. Yeah. So be careful how you conduct and interact with that special person in public, especially if it's a negative interaction. You don't need everybody in your business. So think about that, moms. And then finally, when we talk about etiquette, initially I talked about that it's linked to a behavior and how you conduct yourselves. But it's also perception as well. One final thing I want to share with you, and that is regarding your attire when you go out, and how that links back to etiquette. Because again, good etiquette is all about someone respecting you, that's what it leads to. And you also want to garner respect by how you dress, yes, moms. And why is that important? Because your children are watching as well. Be careful what you choose to put on and how you carry yourself. Because if you want to garner respect, people are gonna sum you up within seven seconds. So if you're going out with PJs on, you're not wearing a bra and you should be. Okay. Again, this mom's, we should be doing better in this area. And you say, I'm comfortable with me, and I'm gonna do me, and that's fine. But now you have children. And really, is that how you want your daughter to carry herself? Yeah, think about that because it's no longer just you. Yeah. All right, ladies, that's it for the day. I certainly hope you enjoyed this episode. If it seems like I was barking at you today, you know, I take things, some things very seriously, because again, I really have a soft heart when it comes to children and the impact we have on our children because of their innocence. They don't know any better. It's up to us to educate them. And I hear you. Hey, I wasn't taught this when I was growing up, and I saw this when I was growing up. Yep, me too. But now it's time to change our perspective and how we navigate life because now we have children tagging along. We are responsible for them. We are more than just providers, we are more than just nurturers. We are examples, we are mentors to our children so that they can grow up and then they can pay it for to their children. Yeah, see how that works? We talk about generational curses, but let's also talk about generational blessings. Right? So keep that in mind. Now, if you do enjoy today's episode, definitely tell another mom. And also visit my webpage, singmomsunited podcast.com. Visit me on YouTube. And if you haven't subscribed to my channel, please do so. Also, I am looking for you to provide me with some feedback. If you enjoyed this episode or like to share your thoughts about this episode, hey, let me know. I would love to hear from you. And if you taught your child something, anything, I want to know that too. And you may be a guest on one of my upcoming shows because that's what's important is for us to teach our children and to pay it forward. Because as moms, we don't always get it right. We don't always know where to start. And someone may say, you know what, I taught my child this, and my child is doing excellent in this area. Well, why wouldn't we want to pay that forward and let other moms know so that they can try it out and maybe even put their own spin on it? But that's what this podcast is all about. All right, you have a wonderful day, a great week, and a marvelous month. Take care.